Day The First (Tuesday, July 21 – Kentucky, West Virginia, Virginia, North Carolina)

Allyson, Suzy, Daniel and I traveled a treacherous 700 miles to our first destination: Nags Head, North Carolina.

Before you wonder who Suzy and Daniel are, let me explain.  Suzy is my fearless and wonderful 12 year old Saturn SC-2, which in car years (those are like dog years but completely different) is nearly ancient.  And Daniel is our very attractive British GPS Navigator.

Anyhow, as I was attempting to relate two paragraphs ago, The Roadtrip began in fine style yesterday morning as our party of four departed Lexington and began our slow trek.

Adventures ensued.

Adventure The First, as narrated by Allyson:
An hour out of Wilmore and Daniel the GPS dies.  Is it the GPS or is it it the cigarette lighter?  We try a cell phone charger.  No power.  Laura uses her her wonder woman powers (and quick thinking) to call the mechanic.  He walks (talks) her through how to open the console and she finds an unplugged cable, compliments of the mechanic who forgot to plug in in.  She plugs it in.  We have power.  We have a working GPS.  We are happy.  The End.

Adventure The Second:
We are seeking sustenance around the noon hour and have our sights set on Panera.  Or rather, our sights aren’t set because we have no idea where it actually is, driving around a mall complex of the worst design.  Ever.  In the midst of chaotic traffic and complete lack of traffic-planning on the part of the city designers, we stumble upon a yellow-red light.  It was yellow, and then it wasn’t, and Newton’s Third Law dictates a Saturn in motion will stay in motion.  I choose to maintain control of the car (going a shocking 30 miles an hour) rather than unmaintaining control of it, thus running the yellow-red light.  There was a police officer behind us as evidenced by flashing lights and a nice man in a uniform.  I hand him my license and insurance, fully expecting a ticket, which I really don’t deserve because I really tried to stop and I really shouldn’t say really this much.  Before he heads back to his car I ask him woefully where the Panera is, because we’re lost and confused and this is the worst mall road design ever.  He laughs, agrees, gives me detailed instructions to the Panera, and hands my license back without even a warning.  Who would’ve guessed….so no ticket.  Rejoicing ensued.  I like the word ensued, by the way.

Adventure The Third, as narrated by Laura with random deletions and censorship and murderous glances by Allyson:
Allyson has a friend.  A friend of the male variety.  He happens to live an hour away from the mall with the awful traffic, the Panera and the very nice police officer.  Allyson hasn’t seen this friend in a month.  That is a sad thing.  I was going to say “a very sad thing” but she thinks that’s inappropriate, so I made the necessary adjustments.  Anyhow, I contacted said friend without her consent or knowledge and inquired if he would like to meet us for lunch.  Wonder of wonders, he agreed, and our little surprise was set.

So we found ourselves desperately looking for a “random” Panera while Allyson wondered why I was suddenly and mysteriously craving a restaurant for which I had no particular affinity the day before.  It didn’t take her long to find out, as she turned around after ordering and I’d been joined by a dashing gentleman that looked strangely familiar.  Much smiling and lunch ensued.  See, I told you I liked that word.

Adventure The Fourth:
We encounter our first tollbooth.  It is unfortunately not of the phantom variety.  However, we are very excited to successfully navigate it without incident.  The second tollbooth isn’t nearly as exciting.  The third is just annoying…we like our money, but apparently so do they.

Adventure The Fifth:
400 miles into our 9,000 mile roadtrip, Suzy’s cruise control breaks.  Apparently her computer brains take great delight in frying cruise control modules.  And apparently Laura and Allyson are driving the next 8,600 miles the old-fashioned way. BOOOOOOOOO!!!

Adventure The Sixth:
Allyson doesn’t know how to drive stick.  Or rather, until Adventure Six, she didn’t know.  Now, to her immense surprise, she does, successfully driving three miles on backroads through two stop signs and two stoplights (all of which she did stop for unlike her companion driver), one of them on a steep incline.  She only stalls once, but NOT on the hill, complements of her newly acquired skills with the emergency brake.  We reach the highway without mishap.  Props to the driver behind her, he is quite possibly the most patient man in the state of Virginia.

Adventure The Seventh:
We go through a tunnel under the ocean.  It is awesome.  w00t.

Adventure The Eighth, which Allyson would narrate but she still has no idea how this could possibly have happened:
It is time to switch drivers again, and Laura is far too lazy to put her shoes on before walking around the car.  When she gets back in the car, she wants to check her socks to see how dirty they got, and through a strange series of contortions her toes end up near the top of the door.  Simultaneously, she attempts to close the door while looking at her sock, and through a mysterious and possibly magical series of events, her middle toe gets slammed in the TOP of the door.  Laura is laughing and crying hysterically.  Allyson is confused.  If you are too, don’t worry, you had to be there.

Adventure The Ninth:

There are a lot of stars.  And lots of sand.  The ocean is big.  Laura and Allyson are tired.  YAY they arrive at the beachhouse at which Amanda’s family is so kindly letting them crash for two nights.  Sleep ensues.  I promise that’s the last time I use that word today.

Addendum:

License plates gathered so far:
VA, WV, NC, PA, MS, IL, OK, ME, NY, KY, NJ, AL, IN, MD, AK, DE, TN, AZ, plus DC and Quebec.

Quotes that were much funnier if you were there:

Allyson: “Are those the Blue Ridge Mountains?  They’re very blue!”
Laura when she sees some cows: “Civilization!!!”
Allyson: “That’s awesome vegetation.”
Laura: “Shrubbery!”

Post-Addendum:

I’m not posting pictures now.  Nor am I posting anything about today (Day 2).  I am going to sleep.  However, pictures will probably be on Facebook sometime in the semi-near future.  Gnight.